Jacob Kowalski: "But why would I have to wear something like this?"
Newt Scamander: "Because your skull is susceptible to breakage under immense force.
Quick: Utter shlock. Pure. Unadulterated Schlock."
I am honestly surprised that I sat through FBaWtFT. I was on a plane and I am incorrigibly lazy, so I had inertia as a part of my decision making.
I hold movies that have to advocate that they look cool in low esteem already. Not particularly looking cool and pushing Harry Potter to a place it did not need to go is a recipe for hackery. I did enjoy seeing Ron Perlman as a goblin.
What honestly upset me was that Colin Farrell was a reasonable if not excellent villain. *Spoiler* there was no reason to replace him at the finish with Johnny Depp.
I thought this nothing new, nothing non-obvious, and therefore ineligible for a patent.
1 out of 5: Skip it if at all possible.
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