My Neighbor Totoro {となりトトロ} (1988)

 

”まっくろくろすけ、出っておいで！”　（めい）

Totoro may be one of the cutest kid films of all time.  It sort of defies logic. [Kids defy logic....so I guess this should just be expected.]

I've lost track of how many times I've seen this movie.  [also defies logic...]

This time when I was watching I found myself asking a question I had not really asked before, "where is the mother Totoro?"  It's pretty hard not to notice the parallels between the Totoro family and the human family. They both have three members.  Both families have a dad, a middle child and a very small child.  Yet, the human family has a mother who is absent and in the hospital.  Which begs my question of "where is mama Totoro?"  

I also wondered if Totoro is doing the same thing for his family that Mei and Satsuki's father is doing.  I had always understood that Dad had moved the family out into the country to ensure that his children had a happy childhood unfettered by the concerns and reality of the city.  He wants them to experience childhood "aka the Totoro" while they still can.  Maybe the Totoro wants his children to experience their childhood too before it's too late.

Yeah and Catbus is always awesome.

Ratings:

Kids:  See it

Adults: See it

South Parkers:  See it  (I've seen the episode where Cartman aka The Coon meets up with Kuthulu and rides him.  It's a clearly influenced by Totoro.)

Classic Cineophiles: See it

 Looking for a reason to hate things:  Skip it

On a scale of Thunder in a jar to lightning in a bottle, I give My Neighbor Totoro 4 out of 5 stars.  

The Dark Knight (2008)

"I'm not crazy. I'm not." (The Joker)
"I'm like a dog chasing a car.  I wouldn't know what to do if I caught it." (The Joker)

After going to see part III (-see post), I thought I should go back and see what it was that gave me such high expectations for The Dark Knight Rises.  And really here is full reason: Heather Ledger is incredible.  Yeah...the movie is tighter flows well, maintains pace, and keeps upping the ante so as to keep it exciting, but all of that is meaningless when The Joker is on the screen.

I want to approach understanding The Joker ( and Heath Ledger's performance) from a holistic perspective.

-The voice:  If you've ever seen A Knight's Tale, you might understand how I really had no respect for Heath   Ledger's vocal skills.  However, I found his earthy/reedy from the top of his chest annunciations to be impeccable.  Somehow, whereas the Jokers of yore; Nicholson, and the 1960's one, found their place in the Joker's high cackles, that this Joker growls and embodies filth is refreshing.

-The Swagger:  It's difficult to physically become crazy.  It's like saying "Walk crazy.", but in reality those that are crazy think they are sane and thus walk just like you and me.  So a great performance is all in the details and not in the over-the-top decisions.  It's funny how they come off on screen the opposite of what you would expect. Crazy right?  Heather Ledger does all the little things right.  His duck footed gate.  They way his body never hesitates in a decision.  (Otherwise he might have a plan....)

-The hair and make-up:  Take what was a clean white faced villain from the comics and grit him up.  That's what happened here.  It's actually rather beautiful.  The hair is just the right shade of off-yellow green.  His purple suit has the right age and layers.  His make-up sweats and cracks.  SO many knives!

-The script:  While most comic book based movies aren't known for great dialogue, who ever wrote the lines for The Joker should have gotten 2X to 3X pay.

Ratings:

Method Actors:  See it

Catwoman:  Skip it (super villain in-fights just aren't that cool.)

ODB:  I think you rapped kinda like The Joker

Younger than 12?: Skip it  (There will be other times for delve into madness and the dark.)

In a full theater size theater alone?:  (This is how I saw it the first time.)  See it

On a scale of 2015 (as imagined in 1985) to 2015 (as imagined in 2012),  I give The Dark Knight 3.88 out of 5 stars.

 

The Dark Knight Rises (2012)

Spoilers

"When Gotham is in ashes, you have my permission to die." (-Bane)

A fitting and epic conclusion to a fantastic trilogy.  It completely deserves to be included with the others as part of Batman lore.  (Not you- "Batman and Robin").

It's unfortunate that I didn't actually like it all that much.  It was good.  That's about it.

However, I will go ahead and talk about some of the things I did like, and of course highlight the moments I didn't enjoy as much.

The Good: The cast was incredible.  I didn't find a single performance lacking.  I always like Gary Oldman.  Joseph Gordon Levitt continues to impress.  Michael Caine is Michael Caine.  Anne Hatheway is always more talented than I give her credit for, and Christian Bale is a tinsel town "movie-star".  I would like to highlight the relative unknown actors that made this whole movie come together.  Well done, Aidan Gillen, Christopher Judge, Marion Coutillard, and Brett Cullen (BC- you rock in everything!).  A special well done goes out to Tom Hardy for taking on the impossible role of Bane and pulling it of with grace, dignity, and a great deal of respect.  ( I liked the voice.)  Oh, and if you look closely, Bill Cowher and Hines Ward also make cameos.

The not so Bad:  There was too much story.  It had so much potential....but there was way too much of it to be a convincing and amazing movie.  I would love to see this movie done as a miniseries or an HBO 10 episode season.  It deserves it.  However, it was underserved by its 2 hour 30 minute length.  


To make the movie fit, critical character development, and tension were sacrificed.  The idea of the "pit" was cool.  Darkness is a writers bread and marmite.  However, that sort of story line takes time- and I don't mean like 30 minutes.  I mean like a whole week to wait in darkness with the character between continuing the story.  I also thought that the element of time and geography were sadly lacking from The Dark Knight Rises.  I was sort of surprised that Christopher Nolan would commit such a grievous error as just magically teleporting Batman back to Gotham even though it was under heavy guard and all the bridges were out.  I admit -he is Batman- so I completely understand how Batman got there...it just grated my movie senses.


Catwoman.  Way to go Anne Hatheway.  You are a respectable actress.  Unfortunately, I did not see how your story ended up with you kissing Batman.  Your story was good enough, but they pushed into somewhere I didn't believe it would go.  


Bane-  You were so cool!!!  and then your final fight sequence with the Dark Knight fell horribly short.  After your epic beat down at about the (1/3) mark I expected the final showdown to be ****!!!^^^^#### (Rocky IV in like 10 minutes) , but sadly the fight sequence did not meet the expectations the film created.


( I bet the first run through Chris Nolan made of this movie was borderline 3.5 hours, and it was probably better than the 2.5 hour version.....but studios don't do movies over 3 hours.  T_T )


Ratings


Everyone:  See it


Fan boys:  Saw it


Those affected by or close to tragedy:  my most sincere and heartfelt condolences, sympathy, and empathy.  


Editors:  Skip it


Jay Michael Strazyniski:  I would have loved to see you take on this story and give it the justice it deserves


On a scale from 20 minutes of fireworks to the same amount of fireworks in 20 seconds, I give Batman: The Dark Knight Rises 3.5 out of 5 stars.  

 

Conan the Barbarian (2012)

"This is the way of steel."  (Ron Perlman: Conan's father)

Have you ever been so disappointed with your Christmas present that even the box wasn't fun to play with?  That's how I felt about Conan the Barbarian (2012).

yup.

Honestly, a waste of movie and a poor excuse for what should have been "CONAN" in all it's glory.

I do have a positive critique in that Jason Mamoa is fantastic.  I think he should star in more movies.  I even think he makes a great Conan.  I just wish he was in better movies.

Beyond that....yikes.


Here is a list of tell tale signs that a movie is going to be horrible.  


-The movie starts with a wildly unimaginative and ludicrous prologue narrated by an actor that was too good to be in the movie.  (Check:  Morgan Freeman)


-The movie has to subtitle the names of all the places the characters go, even though your audience doesn't care. (Double Check)


- The movie moves so fast main characters are introduced and abandon in the course of 5 minutes. (Check)


- The characters travel to places they really have no reason to go to.  (Check)


- The main villains goals are misaligned with their actions and worse...the final show stopper fails to deliver. (Check-aroo)


-Buildings start to fall down for no reason (Check)


Ratings:


Arnold:  See it


Love silly sword fights? :  Meh, why not?


Kahleesis:  See it


Super-villains:  Skip it


Directors:  Skip it  (I would be surprised if this one wanted to watch his creation more than once.)


On a scale of Free bird to Surfin' bird, I give Conan the Barbarian (2012) 1.6 out of 5 stars.      

The Rum Diary (2011)

"What was that drug we took?  -Idunno - We should get more of it." (Johnny Depp's character)  [Hmmmmmmmmm] That is about all that I can muster to say about The Rum Diary "hmmmmmmm".  While I liked the concept of  watching Johnny D drunkenly saunter around Puerto Rico, even that would have required a plot.  Nothing they did made sense other than it was a strange milieu of nostalgic progressiveism cast against 1950's era swine bred fat american capitalists in a tropical paradise.  (It should have been cool......It was not.)

There were some points in favor of the movie.  The beautiful vista shots are in fact beautiful and somehow not hammy.  Nice job cinematography crew.  Johnny Depp and the cast were reasonable and none of them should feel shame for being in this movie.  (Oh, watching JD breath fire from high proof rum was pretty cool. -I hope he did his own stunts.)  The CG tongue for their LSD scene was also rather excellent.

This is one of those movies that I wished had just stayed in my head as fiction.  My brain version of this movie was shorter and better than the real deal.

Ratings:

Like drug movies?:  Watch Fear and Loathing

Dreamed of going to a far off tropical paradise?:  Skip it

Like drinking?:  Watch the Big Lebowski or just something better.

Johnny Depp-ophile?:  I suppose you HAVE to see it.

PETA:  Skip it  (They go to a cock fight.  I'm sure the birds weren't harmed during production...but

On a scale of desert island to dessert island, I give The Rum Diaries 1.945 out of 5 stars.

Moonrise Kingdom (2012)

"That may have been the best pitched campsite I have ever seen.  I would have given it a commendable at inspection." (Scoutmaster Ward: Edward Norton)  Wes Anderson films are by nature visually stunning in all the ways a blockbuster isn't.  Color, framing, shot selection, angle, and filter are all used to achieve the exact effect that Wes Anderson desires.  Wes Anderson seems to make movies that are all perfect according to him, and that's all there is to it.  I really hope he just keeps making them.  The more of them I watch, the more I want to compare Anderson to Yasujiro Ozu.  If you are good at one thing: do it well.   It's nice to watch a true master refine and perfect his craft.  Each movie; a wave that crashes further up the shore than the last.

In Moonrise Kingdom, Wes Anderson took on a topic that I thought might turn out to be borderline audience scqueem inducing: very very young adolescent love.  Our protagonists are a 12 year old boy and 13 year old girl who run away together after having fallen in love (Spoiler Alert:  They even get married.).  Anderson was very smart to set the story in 1965.  Without that decision, the audience may not have been so understanding of the emotional/and physical actions of our young couple in love.  The sixties give the story just enough of whimsy and adolescent indulgence to alleviate audience fears about the age appropriate-ness of Suzy and Sam's relationship.  (Don't be surprised if Kara Hayward (Suzy) and Jared Gilman (Sam) go on to be very talented actors.)

On other points, Wes Anderson's ensemble cast was up to the challenge as usual.  "There are only small actors."  I especially like that Tilda Swinton stars as a character without a name.  She is only referred to as Social Services.  It was a wonderful quirky touch.

Edward Norton was a great scoutmaster.

Ratings:

Boy Scouts:  See it......but only if your scoutmaster thinks it's appropriate

Social Services:  See it.  Check-out the great costumes you used to wear.

Doris Day:  Watch for the beach homage to your movies

Davy Crockett:  Your hat is back.

20 year older you:  Go back and watch it again.  I think this movie will most likely age positively.

On a scale of Tofu with rice to Tofu in soy sauce, I give Moonrise Kingdom 3.8 out of 5 stars.
      

Project X (2012)

"I'm sorry dude.  I lied.  I don't know how to fix any of this." (Costa)  I can honestly say that I was super surprised by the quality of this film.  I just sat down on friends couch and they said, "Hey, We're watching Project X.":  Seldom does that lead to something memorable.

Here is the thing I thought was the best about Project X:  the pacing.  if the movie opened with something great or even let the party get out of control too quickly, the whole movie would have been ruined.  It's like you start your amp out at 11.  You can't go up after that.  It some ways it reminded me of "Zulu" or "The Battle for Helm's Deep".  Great directors and editors know how to tease an audience to build anticipation and skepticism.-{ Yeah, there is really no way this party can get any crazier...- and then it does.}

I thought the home movie aspect of the film made it somehow more believable and allowed the audience to lose sense of that this was a movie.  -nice touch

As for the actors.  I liked them all enough.  But the only memorable performance is Oliver Cooper as "Costa".  I really hope he is a genuinely nice and decent man in real life, so it was actually an acting challenge to be that much of a greasy reprehensible douchbag on screen.  (Somehow, I still thoroughly enjoyed the character.)

Ratings

24 Hour party people: Must see

Kid N' Play:  See it

Barney Stinson:  See it  (it's Legen----)


Parents:  Skip it  (You really don't want to know all that could go so wrong or so right with your teenagers.)


Up and coming directors:  Watch it for a clinic on how to pace a story.


On a scale of Order to Chaos, I give Project X 3.62 out of 5 stars.